Tomorrow is Lil B's 6th birthday. We have been celebrating all weekend and I am tired. Yesterday we had a tea party with her little friends. She invited a boy also and he was wild. He put a little spin on the tea party for sure. It was cute though. My teapot cake came out pretty good for a first time.
Last night we went to our friend Scott and Tammy's house and hung out. Tam showed me how to make a real teapot cake.....we hung out while the men went and did their own thing.
On the way home, we were driving and talking and I happened to look to the side and at the same time J and I said- "deer" and BANG into his truck it went. I think unfortunately we probably killed the deer but amazingly hitting a deer in that truck felt like running over roadkill, very minor movment in the vehicle as we made impact.
Today we are having family over for the family party. I am making a ham. I think my gram might actually like ham.
Thanksgiving is next week. I have been struggling with not being a part of my gram and aunt's day as I didn't choose it to be this way. I am making my first Thanksgiving dinner, but I know it won't be the same. Trish will be in Philly, Aunt Sandy and gram will be home and mom is gone. There is alot to be thankful for of course, but the day certainly won't be the same without mom or her side in representation. I guess I will have to sit there and just keep making the comments mom would make about the food if she were there. I miss her.... I keep listening to my Faith Hill CD song that reminds me of her and I pretty much cry and get it out of the way until the next time. There are just so many things that keep her still here but so far away. Here are the words:
You are Still Here
Thought I saw you today
You were standing in the sun then you turned away
And I knew it couldn't be but my heart believed
Oh it seems like there's something everyday
How could you be so far away
When you're still here
When I need you you're not hard to find
You're still here
I can see you in my baby's eyes
And I laugh and cry
You're still here
I had a dream last night
That you came to me on silver wings of light
I flew away with you in the painted sky
And I woke up wondering what was real
Is it what you see and touch or what you feel
Cause you're still here
Oh you're everywhere we've ever been
You're still here
I heard you in a stranger's laugh
And I hung around to hear him laugh again
Just once again
Oh...
Thought I saw you today
You were standing in the sun then you turned away
Away
