So I went to the doctor finally....it is a bladder infection. Oh and maybe kidney stones. I will find out in a few days. So, I have a fever going on and a bladder infection and I may have to pass kidney stones-does life get any better? Sure it does!
My professional race car driver husband decided to take the kids for a ride on the golf cart and

<------take a look at his superb driving skills. (I guess he kept his winning driving at the track this weekend.) Somehow they all tried to fit between the house and the car and played ping pong off the two... so that makes it official: My car has dings on every side of the car. It has been said it will be fixed this week but my other dings have been there for quite some time. How does that saying go? The plumber's house is always the last to be fixed? I am not even thinking showing some crack will get this fixed any quicker. Lord have mercy. Ok, so I did laugh too.... it is just a material thing and as for the house, just some minor dings and of course the golf cart made it out just fine. See what happens when I stay in the house to help my dad out with some issues? Thank you, family for adding your touch to my ride! I had to bust chops with this, take pictures and all. I guess it served the purpose and made me less upset.
Mother's Day is upcoming - I am having a tough time lately about it, not that I expect anyone to understand. I have some things to do at the gravesite as her present that I am hoping to give to her as maybe a positive way to handle the day. I am excited about them yet disappointed that I am starting to grieve moreso alone. I think after time that probably happens where you can't share things with others to make it better. Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it on the outside. I used to really lean too much on others to help with the healing part of things as I do to validate alot of parts in my life. Do you ever really heal? I doubt it. I suppose keeping her alive in spirit and maybe traditions can help with the coping for now. I guess somethings you have to just take validation from within that you are doing the right things and will be ok. I think mom has taught me quite a bit since she has died. I did not let it bitter me which I am proud to say, almost, but I didn't. Mom always saw the best in life on the dreariest of days. I hope I can try to always see the best too.